How Not to Kill Your Baby seemed like the perfect gift when my mother and step-father adopted a few months back. Granted they had already used me and two other siblings as practice babies, but extra prep never hurts. Admittingly, I could not help flipping through the book before putting a bow on it. In a nutshell, this book exemplifies how basically everything could easily kill your baby. Only key protective steps, like cocooning your baby in a permanent layer of bubble wrap, can keep them safe. Do not let the world mentally scar your little one because that is your job as a parent.
On a more serious note, this book is a satire. While it is a hilarious read, do not expect actual advice. A lot of the 1 or 2 star reviews for this book seem to be from people who missed a key part of the book called “comedy”. This “comedy” may be a strange and unknown concept to said people, who were sadly born without a funny bone. Or maybe their funny bone was broken by parents who failed to read this book and it did not heal properly, forever robbing them of the gift of genuine laughter. A truly sad thought.
Back to a cheerier note, this book is a belly tickler. It is a short read at only 136 pages and that does include pictures. This is something that can be read in under an hour but that just makes it a great coffee table book. Where else can you find precious advice about the horrifically terrifying act of raising a baby? Kids are tiny bundles of learning experiences. Does little Johnny know if he skins his knee it could get infected and require an amputation? Of course not! Kids will basically try to commit suicide on a daily basis out of sheer ignorance.
If you have friends on insist on those non-comical “serious” parenting books, slip this in there too. To slip back into seriousness, raising a child is a legitimately scary prospect. Getting a few laughs mixed into there can dissolve some of the nervousness of soon-to-be parents. Raising kids is a difficult process that there is no concrete formula for. And no one book could possibly cover it all. But as kids are little bundles of joy, it is important that a parent remembers to laugh. And this book will have you doing just that.